As I would first wake, still cloudy from sleep-
I felt normal till realization set in, feeling
the bile and alcohol I drank to try to ease the pain,
from a mind that was crazed and half insane.
There was not enough alcohol to fill the
seven seas that would take the atrocities
that were done to me. All I could feel was
alone, for the one I loved was gone.
Taken by those I trusted, leaving me
trusting no one at all, I was but a child-
all alone in a world filled with cruelty.
I felt the ache right into my bones.
The sun would never shine on my face-
I lived in perpetual darkness.
Sadness filled my every waking moment-
Happiness was never again to be found.
The cold wind blew through my soul,
telling me my life would always be this.
Every single day I felt my heart break again-
Nothing could make what I lost better.
Wishing each night, I would never wake in the morn,
when I did, cursing God for not taking me home.
Soon I lost all faith at all, permanently scarred,
life just left me feeling always tired.
When others would say repent or go to Hell-
I would wickedly laugh, saying I will be
quite comfortable there, for my life was
nothing but Hell on this Earth plane.
Now I am old and still it seems so new.
Cruelty is a lesson I never learned.
Still I go on, knowing soon it won’t matter.
My mind was tortured and soon will be gone.